Sex and Mind Control - A Powerful Combination

In my previous blog I talk about mind games and how I ended up playing mind games myself.http://wcvandouwe.blogspot.co.za/2016/03/mind-games.html

In that blog I write on how I played mind games, but I never went into details why I played these mind games. The reason is this man used sex and mind control over me.  I was a perfect candidate for him to do this on.  In this article that I have now done it is on sex and mind control.

Mind control cannot be used on people that have normal healthy lives.  It can only be used on people whose lives have been messed up in some way, and they have never dealt with it.  As I said, I was a perfect candidate for him; I was so insecure and living in the past.  As the man said I was a victim, and yes he was right 

The silent treatment is also a mind game, and believe me this man was an expert on this.

The Silent Treatment

We have all suffered many forms of abuse but the least talked about is “The mind game” otherwise known as the silent treatment; i.e. deliberately ignored to cause harm to another person’s mental wellbeing, sent to Coventry, deliberate sabotage to a person’s life or/and credibility and is one of the most harmful methods of abuse used by abusers who feel that

“If they do not use their hands to physically abuse then it isn’t abuse.”

Wrong

It is abuse to ignore someone’s needs emotionally and make them feel worthless, depressed and will cause long term damage so much so that in many cases it can lead to the victims physical health being harmed.

To deliberately cause harm to someone by use of the silent treatment, deny a person any emotional care, deny them any praise, starve them of love, affection, compliments, positive feedback, to regularly reject, degrade and deny a person any emotional responsiveness and to ignore a person’s needs is mental abuse or also known as psychological abuse. It is repetitive abuse that’s aimed at controlling, diminishing another person’s wellbeing in order to hurt, punish, harm or control them.

The silent abuser is able to switch off emotionally to the pain and suffering he is causing his victim and will deny he is the problem and he may tell himself or others that he is the victim.

You stop being a victim when you become the abuser.

The abuser is capable of closing down all reasonable sense of emotions and turn into a cold heart very fast as he withdraws into his own world without any care for his victim’s distress. The abuser will behave in society charming, calm, happy, he will be seen by others as a pillar of society, gentle natured, helpful, kind, caring and fool the outside world into thinking he is abused and his partner is the abuser. This is classic of a mental abuser. They will have their partner labelled a mental case whilst he plays the victim and saint and makes her the subject of every ones rejection by labelling her with an unbalanced mind.

The true victim will be further rejected not only by her abuser but also by his friends, work colleagues, family and others he is likely to meet. The abuser needs to feel in control and he will seek constant approval from those around him and convince them that he’s the true victim. They will offer him advice and he will feed off their pity which will make him feel even more in control as he plays the victim.

He wrote 5 articles and no, I will not put the link here but I will include what he wrote the last blog.

"Unfortunately these current words are in line with her past behaviour and make me wonder if she did change after all. I suppose that my compassion for her may soon be replaced by negative feelings (e.g., betrayal, disrespect, lack of trust). "

My response: I must have changed my past behaviour as he lost the control over me!! During the time I knew him, he knew showed compassion not even once. 

"Nevertheless, my trust in women has once again been shattered. I am picking up the pieces now, as it is indeed time for me to move on. It will take a while for me to trust again. As we say in Dutch: "Trust comes on foot and leaves on horseback" (a quote attributed to Dutch politician Thorbecke)."

My response:  Please the man did not even like me, he had discarded me (once again) to have a relationship with this woman that I think he met on a dating site, and the way he writes you would think that he loved me, but he never did.  He only contacted me again, after he broke up with woman, I guess to resume his mind control and I was seriously very angry with him that he could think that he could waltz into my life whenever he felt like it.

"Although this episode did cause embarrassment to some, and even humiliation to others, I do not regret my actions following her alleged disappearance. I care for people. My caring is fulltime and not part-time. If that bothers people then so are it. Non, je ne regretted rien."

My response:  I don't know anything about it causing embarrassment or humiliation to others, the people that he contacted during this period, thought he was a raving lunatic.  He even contacted the man I worked for.  He caring is fulltime?  That’s so very sad, so untrue, I am not sure that he is capable of caring for anyone but himself.  If you knew him and read all this blogs you would come to this conclusion also.  His blogs are always about him and how he got hurt and no mention of the other parties involved how they were hurting!!!

Sex and Mind Control 

There are two groups of people that use mind control in order to get sex.

The first group

It’s a poor reflection on our society that people have to trick and deceive people in having sex with them.

The second group

They used mind control and manipulation to get what they want.  They excel at this.  The people that they are abusing can’t even see what is occurring as they have become very dependent on the abuser.  A lot of these abusers are psychopaths.

Brain washing

We need to understand normal behaviour first, when our lives are filled with healthy normal and activities and that we are happy.  But life is not like that all the time, sometimes we stumble, sometimes life gives us a shove, sometimes we cannot overcome obstacles that block our path.

Unable to function normally, one begins to feel fear.  Normally fear will help us be motivated in solving the problem but when we been in a state of unhappiness for too long, it leads to other complications, it can lead to exhaustion and finally a burnout.

One needs to return to a normal way of functioning.  One can just accept things and depressions set in. When we try and cope with the problem we become filled will anxiety.  Some deal with it by becoming angry and aggressive.  It's actually a cycle, sadness, extreme sadness, followed by extreme depression, then to being angry, and so angry with everything, one feels the anger is not so bad, much better than depression, it gives one something to vent at, then the whole cycle repeats itself.  A lot of people just pretend that the problem does not exist and are in denial.

People that are functioning on normal levels and do not feel this fear, are not susceptible to mind control. The high mental energy of fear provides the mental energy necessary for the alterations of thought required for effective mind control.  The reasons for this fear can be caused by many things, mostly by bad things happening in the past, and the past still haunts us. This fear is the first step to entrapment.  The next step is to remove the fear or pain by giving a way to take that fear, and restore the feeling of power, enabling one to function.

Sex is one thing that produces fear, especial for a rape victim, the fear can be enormous.  This means that sex is used as a technique for mind control, because of its power to produce fear!

Free will is synonymous with the idea that the individual is important. In order to rob someone of his free will he must also be robed of his self-esteem. His "belief" that he has value must be changed.  Free will is synonymous with the idea that the individual is important. In order to rob someone of his free will he must also be robed of his self-esteem. His "belief" that he has value must be changed.

If we function using our God given free will, why then would anyone submit to the process of mind control when its sole function is to rob us of our free will? I feel the answer is that we are all vulnerable. The reason lies in the subtle ways that souls are lost.

"Belief" systems change only with personal effort. Our "beliefs" must be stable over time or our world would become chaotic. But they must also have flexibility or we would be unable to learn. If a "belief" is a tool to be used in decision-making, it must follow certain criteria:

It must provide simple, stop or go, on or off instructions.

The "belief" must be significant or useful.

Great motivation is required to create or destroy these "beliefs". The time and energy required to form a new "belief is demonstrated by observing the time and energy required to create or destroy a phobia (which is based on a belief). By common observation it takes a week or so for phobias to become set (the reason one gets right back on the horse.) These concepts of normal behaviour - function, dysfunction, denial and belief - are at the heart of all brainwashing techniques. 

The details of sexual mind control 

so how does the sex and mind control thing work?
The abuser makes friends very quickly and thought of very highly in the community.  They appear to be sensitive and very caring people.  The abuser thinks himself as a giver and someone that cares a lot for people.

This can be in group such as cults or in a one-to-one relationship.  The victim idealizes the abuser.  The abuser encourages his victims to adore him and even to love him.  The victim considers this person wonderful, clever, sensitive, the most wonderful person on this planet.

Abuser manipulates people's emotion and sex and mind control is a very powerful combination.  Using this combination they have more control, because the person becomes more open in this intimate way.

A sexual relationship is a more committed relationship and it’s more difficult to get out off.


Blinded by emotion 
Sex and mind control are a potent mixture used by abusers to build strong bonds with their victims and control on their victim is sufficient that they can now begin to do whatever they like. 

Their 'real' nature begins to show up, everything from heavy drinking, 
extramarital affairs, emotional abuse, physical violence, rape. The sex becomes
for their gratification only, or to demonstrate their superiority.

Remember that many cult leaders are psychopaths and the doctrine and rules are a reflection of them, and they typically have 'irregularities' in their sex lives.

The results of sex and mind control 
the combination of sexual mind control is never good for the victims, whether it's in a cult or a one-to-one relationship such as therapist-client, or teacher-student. The imbalance of power means that there is no informed consent and therefore it constitutes sexual abuse. Any benefits that may have existed at the start of the relationship are contaminated. Sexual relationships between those with power and those in their care are never justified.

When undoing mind control, those who have suffered sexual abuse have special considerations. They may have amnesia for traumatic events; they may initially deny it or not want to discuss it. It is often only after some period of recuperation that they are ready to deal with it.

Some researchers suggest that people who have suffered sexual mind control may suffer from the following effects and that they may be acute, delayed or chronic.

Ambivalence - contradictory feelings towards the abuser e.g., rage and 
thinking they are nice people 

Guilt - about betraying or exposing the abuser as well as taking all the blame for the abuse. 

Emptiness and isolation - they are so dependent that they feel a loss when no longer with the abuser 

Sexual confusion - contradictory thoughts and feelings and beliefs 

Difficulty in trusting others - they got it very wrong once, how will they know in future? 

Identity and role reversal - the victim's identity and wellbeing may be entangled with that of the abuser 

Emotional liability - sudden, unexpected emotions which can be very intense, 
Suppressed rage - victims of sex and mind control may have had to deny or hide 
their anger. There may be deep seated rage which has been suppressed for a 
long period. 

Depression and suicidal risk - irrational guilt and shame, and anger at the abuser turned against the self can lead to depression and suicidal thoughts. 

Cognitive dysfunction - poor attention, concentration and memory as well as flashbacks and intrusive thoughts are very common in those recovering from sexual mind control. 

This is why working with professionals to undo the effects of mind control and sex abuse is useful. Confronting the experiences and working through them is important to re-establish one's own identity and develop the ability to have intimate and sexual relationships once again.




Don't be caught! 
Sex and mind control are a powerful combination. The mind control allows a
sexual relationship to develop and once it becomes sexual mind control, the
level of power and domination by the abuser increases tremendously. 

How can you protect yourself from this? By learning how mind control works and 
being vigilant!